Late one night, some years ago

A tempting bowl of cookie dough.

A taste or two,....or so I thought,

One small pinch would hit the spot!

Later on, .... the empty bowl,

A heavy heart, a guilty soul,

That inner war, most quiet din

Had evidenced the latest sin.

So where do all these memories go,

That perpetrate forgotten goals,

Of life serene and thoughts sublime?

‘You do the time, you did the crime!’

And on and on life took it’s toll

On self esteem, the highs, the lows,

Until one day, in God’s sweet time,

I ask for help and help was mine!

Recovery came in spurts and bites,

On habits past, now shone new lights.

For all alone, too big a task,

A daily chore, for help to ask.

A friendly voice came through the air,

O sponsor dear, can this be fair,

To give up all, how can I trust?

The fear’s too great, I feel I must,

Begin somewhere, perhaps today,

To trudge the path another way,

Pray read a thought or think to pray,

And meditate, though day by day,

To any lengths, I’m not so sure,

Through all the tears, is there a cure?

And then one day, in God’s sweet time,

I asked for help and help was mine!

That heavy cross that once I bore,

Has lightened now, a lesser chore.

I’ve learned to trust in tried and true,

I’ve learned to trust the good in you.

I’ve shared my pain, my hopes and dreams

And given up those selfish schemes

Of grander plans and thoughts verbose.

I raise my glass and drink a toast;

“A dozen Steps!” that line by line,

Most surely say, “His Will”, don’t whine

For better things are sure to come,

Life’s rythm now, a calmer drum,

Those fragile thoughts are overcome,

The struggles’ past, “Thy will be done.”

And still today, in God’s sweet time,

I ask for help and help is mine.

By Dean B. ToolTime Group 1997

I CHOOSE TO SUFFER

IF I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM,

I TAKE SOMEONE ELSE IS.

IF NOBODY IS AROUND,

I INVENT ONE!

WILL I, WON’T I

COULD I, SHOULD I.

AROUND & AROUND IN MY HEAD

UNTIL FOOD SHUTS IT OFF.

BRIEFLY, EVER SO BRIEFLY.

THEN

MY JEANS ARE SO TIGHT

I CANNOT BREATH

AH, ANOTHER PROBLEM TO DWELL ON.

GUILT, RECRIMINATION

PAIN & SUFFERING

THERE IS A BETTER WAY.

GOD

SURRENDER NOW

GOD

I HUMBLY SURRENDER

STOP THE FIGHT

TURN IT OVER

GOD I TURN IT OVER TO YOU

AND KNOW A BETTER WAY WILL COME

IN YOUR TIME GOD.

Recovery Tastes Sweeter

Give up the Sugar, who me.

Well, a sweet tooth

Runs down my family tree!

But one bite of sugar means ten!

So giving it up sure makes sense!

It all boils down to how much I want it,

My recovery tastes better,

I better not taunt it! ....Dean B.

FOR TODAY

HOW CAN I LIVE FOR TODAY

WHEN YESTERDAY FILLS ME WITH GUILT.

'IF ONLY’S' CONSUME ME

LEAVING ROOM FOR LITTLE ELSE.

HOW CAN I LIVE FOR TODAY

WHEN TOMORROW IS MY FEAR.

'WHAT IF’S' RULE MY LIFE

AND CLOG MY MIND.

I MUST LIVE FOR TODAY

WHERE YESTERDAY AND TOMORROW,

GUILT AND FEAR ARE MANAGEABLE

LEAVING ROOM FOR HOPE.

I WILL LIVE FOR TODAY

WHERE ABSTINENCE IS REAL.

THERE IS GROWTH IN RECOVERY

AND MY SPIRIT CAN SOAR......... ELAINE K.